When the Goodbye is not enough, there will be turmoil to follow. Picture your past without problems; could you see it? I couldn't because to picture my past without problems would lead to a very different experience. A boring experience, which is not something that I would not want to imagine because it's not me.
I've always said that if the fun I was having outweighed the consequences I would experience from my actions, then it is worth the struggle. Standing at 31, a single mother pending divorce, I will admit that was the dumbest mindset for me to have when going through life.
I look back and I see regret, heartache, pain and fun memories. Be mindful, I did say fun memories. Though I cannot change the outcome, my mind always wonders what if... Well let me tell you about the what if mindset.. Let me tell you about looking back... Let me tell you about regret...
The what-if mindset keeps you in a past where those involved are no longer there, just you. What if I had not said this... What if I had of reacted differently to this... None of that matters. Our story was already written by God and everything happens for a reason. Trust the process, trust the pain you endure and trust those that hurt you as they have shown you a side of them that you will never forget. That is the beauty of trust. It's not always negative when it's broken.
I considered my Rock to be my grandmother. She was the type that didn't say to much to guide you because she knew life does a good job of teaching you about YOURSELF and YOUR LIFE. Coming from a family of killers, dealers and women raising kids without fathers in the household, you have no choice but to be strong and independent. I came up with a few items that helped me while experiencing life from the other side of the game...
1. Pray. (Be specific in your prayers)
2. Say Goodbye and prepare to Move On
3. Don't look back; don't think back; don't playback.
4. Mistakes happen. Deal with it.
5. Take time from the world because the old YOU is leaving.
6. Exercise and eat right.
7. Choose a hobby that forces you to leave your home and Interact with a different circle
8. Remove all negative energy.
9. After 6 months, introduce yourself to the new you and forgive the old you.
10. Do things you have never done.
